Unresolved Grief – Our Hidden Baggage

Take a moment and think about the last time you brought your groceries into your house from your vehicle. Take a moment and think about the cold weather, and how several trips back and forth to and from the vehicle felt like too much, so you loaded yourself with every bag you had in your trunk. Your left arm had bags looped around it from your wrist to your elbow, your right arm was the same and you managed to get a hold of a chip bag between your teeth.

Now imagine as you attempted to walk to your house, fully loaded, your neighbor tried to engage you in conversation. Imagine the dog came bounding out from around the corner, ready to play. Imagine you finally managed to waddle up the steps towards the door, only to realize your hands are full and the door is locked.

Here is the reality of that scenario:

You don’t engage with your neighbor.

You don’t play with the dog.

You are stuck, outside your door, feeling the weight of all that you carry.

Unresolved grief is a lot like this overloaded grocery haul, except it is often invisible. It is the baggage we carry when we experience a loss or loss and avoid feeling and exploring our grief. It is the baggage that weighs us down when we insist on being ok (even though we aren’t) when we pretend to smile, and fill our social media accounts with illusions of being “alright.”

Unresolved grief is our attempt to shield ourselves from the pain of grief by ignoring it, sometimes for years, and choosing to push through. And yet, when we are burdened with grief, we are too heavy-laden to be fully present in the moments of our lives. It metaphorically keeps us from engaging with our neighbor, it keeps us from playing with the dog, and it keeps us stuck outside the door unable to get inside.

This is precisely where specialized grief support comes in. Collaborating with a grief expert can assist you in navigating your grief, facilitating the process of releasing the various emotional burdens you carry. It enables you to reconnect more fully with your life and begin the journey toward healing.



PsychSolutions provides services for trauma, motor vehicle & workplace injury, bipolar, anxiety, depression, insomnia, suicidal prevention & bereavement, and relationship and parenting difficulties.